Tension Stage: Could be a few days, weeks, months or even years into the relationship. The partner begins to create tension over minor things. This stage is characterized by insults, put downs, name calling, threats and “walking on eggshells”. An incident triggers a violent episode.
Violent Episode: This is the most dangerous stage. The incident is something unusual from the way he/she acts. This stage is characterized by lack of control that may result in physical injury, sexual assault or even death. Incident may scare the victim or make he/she question relationship. The incident catches the victim off-guard.
Calm Stage: The aggressor promises to never do it again. The aggressor will often buy flowers, gifts or act caring. There is a promise to get help or change. The aggressor may become the romantic, lovable person the victim first met and spend quality time with the kids.